The Stormy Days of March
Do Nothing Conservatives Strike Again
Oh look the Conpublicans must be so proud!
Canada and the US are at the back of the G8 pack in the race against irreversible climate change, according to the 2008 G8 Climate Scorecards released today by the conservation organization WWF and Allianz SE. Each of the G8 countries were evaluated against twelve objective performance criteria, including greenhouse gas emission trends and progress made toward meeting Kyoto targets.
Take that you socialist fear mongers! We’ll never cut our emissions! NEVER!!! *cough wheeze*
How is Harper still in office?
There’s Only So Many Ways To Say This
General Motors Corp will need to raise as much as $15 billion (U.S.) in cash to shore up liquidity and bankruptcy is “not impossible” if the U.S. auto market continues to slump, Merrill Lynch said today.
GM shares fell almost 15 percent to touch a new 54-year low and the cost to insure GM’s debt rose. The drop was the biggest one-day decline in GM shares in percentage terms since 1999.
Holy crap GM, you’ve had decades to see this coming. But what do they do? Nothing. In fact they wouldn’t even scrap their Hummer line!
The decline has sparked an internal review of GM’s Hummer brand, which is saddled with a gas-guzzling image. LaNeve said Monday that GM hired Citibank to assist in that review, including weighing any potential bids or licensing agreements.
“We believe Hummer is a strong global brand. It has value,” LaNeve said.
Ai Ya!
Maybe there’s some hope left, but one wonders if GM can hold out till 2010.
It’s gotta suck being a GM worker in Ontario that’s for sure though. Speaking of whom, what’s Harper doing about that?
The Harper government has received repeated warnings over the past two years to moderate the pace of petroleum exports so that other sectors of the economy from tourism to book publishing to manufacturing can have the time they need to adapt to a rising dollar.
Today, the disaster came home to us with the announcement by General Motors that it will close its Oshawa truck plant next year throwing 2600 workers out of a job. GM CEO Rick Wagoner said it was unlikely the plant would ever reopen.
Ah the usual: Fuck all. Gotta love Conservatives!
The Order
So, when does life begin? The politically correct answer is that life begins at birth. All that biomass inside the womb is so much mush until the birth event. If you take a machete, and carve out an eight month old foetus from its mothers belly, you may have committed a serious assault on the mother, but the foetus, even though it will tend to stay alive (unless you use your machete again), is not human.
Some people, however, believe that life begins at conception. To them, abortion is murder. To them, carving out an eight month old foetus with a machete is much more than an aggravated assault upon the mother, it is an assault upon a second human being.
Conveniently, those people who believe that life begins at conception can be profiled: we call them Christians. You can stuff adjectives in front of that noun and call them fundamentalists, fanatics, or fascists. And it is important for the success of the abortion rights movement that their critics be proven wrong for them to continue to expand and deepen the network of abortion clinics, abortion enabling activists, and abortion studies faculty in universities.
Christianity can be attacked on a number of fronts. It is not a science, so statistical data, experimentation, and logic can be used to find flaws in the various beliefs. The historical record yields a rich source of anecdotes of tragedy and outrage committed by Christian adherents. By attacking Christianity in our schools, our courts, and in our thought police tribunals, we make it harder for Christians to openly resist what they believe to be a horrible crime.
In addition to attacking Christians to make them shut up, one can also celebrate all voices by having a media that endlessly retells, repeats, and regurgitates in new chunky form the standard scripture on why abortion must be free and accessible. The media also performs an important role in suppressing stories that make abortion look bad, or that bring into question their fundamental dogmas. For example, I point to the absence of stories in the media about the corrupt medical practitioners caught and convicted of bilking the public health system, the frequent arrivals of chopped up women in our emergency wards from back street abortions, the use of abortion to disproportionately terminate females, and the percentage of women who have disturbing psychological effects from the procedure.
Abortion rights are a sector in a larger battle. After some thirty, forty years of conflict, the Christians have been defeated. Abortion rights exist in the land … no longer do women have to go to a back street abortionist to get an abortion, women are empowered, and all women who undergo the procedure can move their lives forward without psychologically traumatic social stigma. Christians have been pushed back and are on the defensive. The last vestiges of Christian culture are being purged from public education, the courts, and public spaces, under the watchful eye of activist teachers, lawyers, judges, and bureaucrats. While several Toronto high schools boast Muslim prayer rooms, they do not have Christian chapels. This is good news for the abortion rights movement.
Those few Christians who still cling to their obsolete beliefs have learnt to be silent in a society that celebrates all voices. Statistically, they do not share in the bounty of social assistance, instead working for themselves or corporatist structures. They have little influence in how social spending is spent, which is far more important that actually earning the money that funds social spending. What little resources they have, of money, of volunteer effort, are futile in the face of paid activists, paid academics, paid judges, paid bureaucrats, and paid media, who can shout down, baffle with bullshit, pre-judge, administratively sabotage, or ignore, according to their profession and revolutionary temperament. This is how it should be in a free society that embraces diversity.
The silent Christians are below the radar. They are now powerless, like a submerged submarine, or a battery of howitzers dug in behind a hill. Like many other groups that have learnt silence from the left, they only really talk to each other, or other groups that have been silenced as well. This is how it should be. The media can now focus on the vision, not the news; academics can expound their deductive utopias, and not the foresights of inductive reasoning; the judiciary can rule based on their beliefs, not the precedents of Common Law; bureaucrats can do as they see fit, not follow their job descriptions.
There will be no changes to access to abortion in Canada. There will be increased funding for clinics, advertising, and academic research. The silent and the invisible are no match for those that are paid and entrenched to defend the pretty rainbow, feed the beautiful unicorn, and protect the four leaf clovers of politically correct correctness, this side of early retirement with a good package.
I, Fenris Badwulf, wrote this
xpd Mitchieville, DustMyBroom, Stormy Days of March
A Proposal For Fetus Fetishists
I propose that we hook up fetus fetishists to diabetes patients or people who need blood transfusions. If they object to being used as free dialysis machines well too bad!
I guess it’s only wrong though when their bodily autonomy is compromised against their will.
Cue the whining about how different!!! the two situations are.
UPDATE
Greg has an awesome idea for fetus fetishists!
But we should only hook them up to diabetes patients if they enter a hospital or engage in illegal stock market trading. That way we can have this conversation:
“Hey, it was your idea to enter the hospital.”
“But I only went to the hospital to visit a sick friend.”
“Excuses, excuses. You knew what could happen, you deal with the consequences. You think we should kill this whole other human being just for your convenience?”
Hee!
Congratulations
Yay Henry Morgentaler! Congratulations on receiving the Order of Canada!
Crime Down In Toronto
And no it’s not because of Harper.
Citywide, crime statistics seem to underscore her cautious optimism: From murder to assault and sexual assault, from car theft to break-ins, nearly every serious-crime indicator has dropped in Toronto this year compared with the same six months in 2007.
And police say the numbers are partly a reflection of TAVIS, the two-pronged Toronto Anti-Violence Intervention Strategy launched 21/2 years ago and central to Police Chief Bill Blair’s bid to reduce violent crime.
2 and half years is longer than Harper has been in office. And good on Blair for coming across a strategy for curbing crime that doesn’t involve packing prisons with petty criminals. What has Harper done on the matter?
The bill packages together five major crime bills that failed to pass the last Parliament and were revived under one heading by the Conservatives, who declared their passage a matter of “confidence” in the government.
Uh yay? This was just passed less than 3 months ago. And we’re supposed to assume from right wing trolls that this change magically happened because of Harper? HA! Anyhow, since this right wing approach to crime has actually passed, one wonders how right wing strategies work at curbing crime? Or don’t.
The Edmonton area was the country’s leader in homicides last year, says a Statistics Canada report released Thursday.
The City of Edmonton’s record-breaking 39 homicides in 2005 contributed to the region — including Sturgeon, Strathcona, Parkland and Leduc counties — topping homicide rates across the country.
and
Edmonton’s youth murder rate last year was almost double the national average, according to statistics released yesterday.
Interesting. Well Albertans, just keep voting in those Conservatives. I’m sure one day they’ll get it right, just gotta do more of the same! What was that expression about insanity again?
Canada Day, 2008
Another Canada Day here in Canada. And what better way to start your day than by stopping to drink from the bottled water of inspiration that is The Toronto Star, a paper which has done so much to make Canada the vision of a country constantly getting worser and worser, like the eternally widening gap between rich and poor, the shriller and shriller reports of obesity from the foodbank industry, and the decades old, yearly campaign to save the seals from immediate extinction.
Let’s look at Royston James, one of the many columnists that nobody in the lunchroom reads. He has a touching piece in the Star * today that highlights a lot of what I like best about the new and improved Canada.
And what I want to focus on is the idea that you can pick and choose which aspects of Vimy-Ridge-Canadian culture * our newcomers can embrace or find outrage with sufficient to demand reparations, handouts, or a tenured university job.
A decade later, in a fancy ceremony at Harbourfront, I faked the allegiance to the Queen part and began to live the duality that is so much a part of the Canadian psyche.
So says Royson. Right, er, Left on, Royson! And I, now openly proclaim that I too, as a newly minted Half-Canadian also fake allegiances to things that I find inconvenient. Now Royson may find the Queen tough to swallow. After all, she is a bitch like Queen Victoria * , Royson does not explain why he dislikes the head of state, and he does not have too. So, neither do I have to explain those aspects of culture that I choose to ignore.
There is a lot of stuff to ignore. Like bonding residential services to ground. The Toronto Star has not seen fit to report on the scandal in the building trades regarding the widespread disregard for the Building Codes, or the fact you can easily profile the groups of village peoples who choose to fake allegiance to the Building Code. Heck, they even bond to the gas pipe! (Ka-Boom!) Heck, they stuff asbestos waste inside air conditioning ducts! (Cough, cough!) Heck, they dry wall over black mold! (Ahh-hack! Ahh-hack!) More power to the village peoples, Royson. I like your dualistic system. Sign me up!
I am no longer Canadian. Instead, I have divided loyalties like Royson. My true allegiance lies with my family and culture that comes from Devonshire * , in Anglo-Saxon occupied England. We have a great culture, and anyone who criticises it is a racist. And soon, with more government funding, we can lobby government for more government funding.
I do not give a shit about most aspects of Canadian culture. They stand in the way of me exploring my Wrecker-Canadian culture. This is my third Canada Day post (2007 * , 2006 * ), along with some other stuff about other useless shit that racist, heteronormative scum Canadians like to celebrate, like Labor codes * , or sanctions against pissing on the subway , or beating women on the subway, or smoking dope in school playgrounds.
No longer will the drive for more rights and handouts be restricted to the confines of the secret society that I support. Instead, I will emulate our aristocrats * . There is much work to be done, and even more proof that work needs to be done * ‘ So get to work, happy workers, I have a legion of tax spenders who need the food money taken from your childrens mouths so we can administer programs for people who do not feed their children. The need is greatest closest to my home: children of my own Wrecker-Canadian culture are in the greatest need. Speaking of which, we need a community center, at least ten tenured positions in a Wrecker-Canadian Studies institute at some University, and a high paying, high pension, low effort job for all Wreckers who complete high school, er, at least attended high school, er, would have completed high school if they had actually gone. And, my lover wants to get a pony for her niece. And I need a new car.
Thanks Royson. I will see you at the Tarpeian rock * on a Tuesday.
Aux armes, citoyens !
Formez vos bataillons !
Marchons, marchons !
Qu’un sang impur
Abreuve nos sillons !
Aux armes, citoyens !
Formons nos bataillons !
Marchons, marchons !
Qu’un sang impur
Abreuve nos sillons !
Aux armes, citoyens, indeed * .
I, Fenris Badwulf, wrote this
xpd Mitchieville, DustMyBroom, Stormy Days of March
Happy Canada Day 2008
Happy Canada Day!!! I FREAKING LOVE MY COUNTRY! To celebrate, here’s Oh Canada… The dance version!!
For those of you who don’t like dance music, here’s the Royal and National Anthems of Canada: God Save the Queen and Oh Canada.
One last thing, because I love my country. I wish a merry fuck you to Harper and his Conservative party. Way to screw up our country! I won’t be shedding tears when you finally get booted out on your ass.
Quote of the Day
I couldn’t have said it better myself!
Or here’s a different idea: instead of hitching our national wagon to the mirage of Alberta’s shitty-oil based future, we could try and build cars that people want, fueled by things that aren’t killing the planet (and ducks), at prices people can afford. Crazy, I know.
Go read the rest of the article. It’s worth it.
Telemarketing, Darwin, and The Food Crisis
One of my earliest, fondest memories of being in telemarketing management was that happy day when a staff member came to me and begged for his job. He fell to his knees and burst into tears. He confessed that he was a lousy telemarketer, but that he needed only another week of employment to be eligible for Unemployment Assistance. I felt good watching this person strip himself of the last shreds of human dignity, and crawl like a worm. A great way to start a Monday.
An important aspect of telemarketing management is crushing the human spirit and moulding the remaining dross into a crisp, obedient machine that generates credit card numbers with flying fingers and a forked tongue. In this, like most progressives, I look to Darwin as my spiritual mentor. He is my guide in my social engineering experiments upon the human souls under my care.
Survival of the fittest means competition, with survival as the reward for the winners, and extinction for the losers. There is also the sexual aspect of Darwin to be considered. Using sexual rewards is a powerful incentive in telemarketing, both positive and negative. And in this way, telemarketing management can reward success and punish failure. Take the crawling excuse of a human being in the first paragraph, for example. If he had enough spine to crawl like a jellyfish to beg for his job, then he had the fighting spirit needed to be a successful telemarketer working for Fenris Badwulf. As a telemarketing manager, I needed to social engineer his personality up from subhuman. Of course, as is common in telemarketing, I forced him to perform oral sex upon his shift supervisor.
It was a long week for ‘Mouthwash Ron’. Every time someone else made a sale, he was dragged into my office to reward the fittest, and give him something to contemplate as he did his dials. He gargled Listerine, while his more successful co-workers snickered, made lip licking motions, or just went outside for a relaxing smoke.
And then, that magic day arrived: Tuesday. After only a few sessions of forced, non-consensual sex in a workplace environment with the knowledge and consent of management, ‘Mouthwash Ron’ closed a sale. I take all the credit. My shift supervisors were impressed. It was a glorious victory for non-Christian morality, Darwinian selection, and social engineering!
Since then, things have greatly improved in telemarketing, much as the gap between the rich and poor is constantly widening but never enough to actually be noticeable to any except those that derive a living from talking about it. Leather bondage gear is freely available for use in employee training. Management can become proficient in sadism. Even a cursory study of the Pride parade can plant a rich harvest of inspiration.
Inspired by Darwin, working in the refreshing vacuum of the absence of Christian morality, we can raise up those who are the losers in the struggle to survive to become useful, somehow, to those that snap the whip and call the tune about who gets which handout.
This, finally, like a long, hard, sweaty management session with a new hire, leads to the Food Crisis. I am confident that our Darwin inspired progressive social engineers will find a satisfying solution to the problem. One that slides over opposition, and penetrates to the warm interior of the problem. Progressive telemarketers do it all the time. Slow or fast, soft or hard, no problem can escape the final solution of post-Christian Darwinianism.
I, Fenris Badwulf, wrote this.
Xpd Mitchieville, DustMyBroom, TheStormyDaysOfMarch
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